Go on now, GIT!

Affinity Spaces…(takes a deep breath)...

A recent experience reminded me of a “PSA” that I shared back in October. And that PSA was inspired by my continued frustration at seeing profiles pop up in spaces designed for specific identities that did not match theirs. Here is what I said then:

PSA:

Affinity groups are real and absolutely necessary. These are spaces designed for groups of people with common identities. They are designed with specific intentions and to provide safer spaces for discussion and connection. This includes groups created virtually through social media.

If you don’t identify with the intended identity, do not expect to be granted access. Do not encroach upon that space. It doesn’t matter if YOU feel your intentions are honorable.

You want to post job opportunities? You want to share an article you find interesting? Find a way to connect and share with the hosts of that space offline.

By entering that space, you potentially negate the possibility of open dialogue about issues that YOU may be causing.

So if you are currently in groups that don’t match your identities and you weren’t specifically invited, please leave and restore a safer space for the people it was intended to serve.

I still stand by that statement. You see, as much as we want the world to be inclusive and equitable, the reality is that it is not. And with the constant political battles between the left and the right, I don’t see that changing anytime soon. 

Imagine being told that your history and culture is illegal to be taught in classrooms. Imagine being judged by the amount of melanin in your skin or your gender. Imagine being told that your ancestors enjoyed their enslavement. Imagine being told, despite scientific research to the contrary, that your identity should be stripped away because it causes harm to others. Imagine being told that your spiritual and religious beliefs are inferior. Imagine that. IMAGINE. THAT.

There are countless examples. And many of us don’t need to imagine any of these because we live them EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. 

And what we need, what we often crave, are spaces to vent… and grieve… and advise… and share… and laugh… and heal with people that match our identities. 

We don’t want that space to be infiltrated because we really don’t want to have to explain to you why we feel the way we do. Your need to center your understanding through our pain is very much giving trauma p*rn and it’s violent. So, stay in your lane. Full stop. Go on now, GIT!

Respectfully.